Crankiness

Crankiness · January 05, 2021
Especially during difficult times like we are experiencing now, everyone is starving for some good news. "I need some good news." "I am desperate for good news." "I never get good news." When will we finally get some good news?" These same people are quick to point out the bad news. "It is all bad news." "The only thing we hear is bad news." "I cannot watch the bad news anymore." "I am so done with all the bad news." This combination can lead to "No Good News CrankaTsuris." This person becomes...
Crankiness · December 21, 2020
There is one saying that never made a whole lot of sense to me. "Hope for the best. But, prepare for the worst." Poor little Timmy never did well in school. He almost always failed his exams. When his parents asked him why he did so poorly in school, Timmy replied: "I hoped for the best. But, I prepared for the worst." It turns out that this saying goes all the way back to Biblical times. The Jewish people were slaves in the land of Egypt. They worked to the point of exhaustion building the...
Crankiness · December 19, 2020
Right after my daughter had been born, I was given a number of instruction manuals on how my child works, and how I can get my child to work. Of course, each instruction manual had completely different instructions for the proper use of the child. However, it seemed like all the instruction manuals had one idea in common: The Time-Out. The instruction manuals advised the parents that when a child misbehaves, or gets a bit out of control, perhaps with a CrankaTsuris, it is important to put the...
Crankiness · December 17, 2020
This is a story about Big Tony. Big Tony was the Big Boss of the Big Family. Big Tony also had a big temper. One day, his Cousin Vinnie came to talk to Big Tony, and apparently rubbed Big Tony the wrong way. Big Tony had this bad habit that if someone rubbed him the wrong way, chances were that the only thing that this person would end up rubbing would be maybe a rock at the bottom of the Hudson River. Everybody in the Big Family put up with Big Tony being sensitive to the way he was rubbed...
Crankiness · December 06, 2020
Author Note: This story is taken from a story that has been expanded upon from the original "kugel" joke set out in Michael Krasny's wonderful and amazing book "Let There Be Laughter." The story below adds a bit of CrankaTsuris, and expands on the silliness of the woes of our friend, Schmulie Shmendrick. We should always have some extra kugel, and of course, only from the most expensive potatoes. *************************** "Shiva" is the Jewish word for for the seven day period of mourning...
Crankiness · December 01, 2020
Author Note: This story is a story that has been expanded upon from the original "Guru" joke set out in Michael Krasny's wonderful book "Let There Be Laughter." The story below adds a bit of CrankaTsuris, and expands on the heroics and exploits of Mrs. Rosenblum. Remember always to bring up your wheely bag when climbing up Mount Everest! ***************************** Recently, the Sierra Club organized a climb up to the top of Mount Everest. This was to be a special climb up the revered...
Crankiness · October 19, 2020
Chances are that all of us have had this one particularly painful experience: A chemical reaction in the head goes off as you hear yourself mouthing two sentences, connected to each other, and that goes like this: "It drives me crazy when....." and "I cannot understand how..." You never want to have to say these two sentences back to back because it can mean only one thing. You are having an uncontrollable CrankaTsuris. Smoke is coming out of your ears. Your blood pressure is through the roof....
Crankiness · September 27, 2020
I want to share something a friend recently posted on social media the following question, with her own answer: "Instead of using the word mistake, what else can we call it? A lesson? A funny story? A chapter in a book? An opportunity to practice solving skills? The important thing is to figure out how it is a gift. Because if you view it as a gift, it will become one." Now, I am completely on board with this. Then, I read all the responses people wrote in: "An experience which is one of many...
Crankiness · August 20, 2020
This is a story I like to share with you that can really be helpful with the effective management of your CrankaTsuris. I was set to meet with the big boss. I never met the big boss before so I was rather nervous. People in the organization were also nervous about me meeting with the big boss. Because they were even more nervous than I was, the organization set up a meeting between Big Tony and myself. Big Tony sat me down, and the discussion went like this: Big Tony: Now, when you meet the Big...
Crankiness · August 15, 2020
Once upon a time, there lived a man named Shmulie Shmendrick. Shmulie Shmendrick was a special man because he owned the one ointment factory in the entire town. Shmulie Shmendrick had an ointment for everything. If you had a rash, he had an ointment for that. If you had sore muscles, he had an ointment for that. If you had a chest cold, it was not a problem. He had an ointment for that as well. Because he had an ointment for every possible condition, Shmulie Shmendrick was the most beloved man...

Show more